I lied that my wife was dead
STAR, back inna the days me did lie enuh, but one a dem catch up on me big time. Me wife always a tell me say my lies could raise the dead, but a never really just that, me just no like disappoint or tell people no.
Me always tell me wife some impossible tings and it always make we kick off. One day, she ask me for some money and me tell her say the bank move and the way me vex me can't remember which bank me join. Di oman almost kill me, but me no think a di lie she vex bout, a just the fact say she never get the money.
Mi sidung and a wonder how me a go get her fi stop war me and then the light-bulb moment come. Me call me granny a farrin and put down a piece a hollering say me wife dead. Because nuff a me family dem no know me wife, the lie work, cuz mama couldn't call nobody and talk bout it. Within days, she send out almost $300,000 and me woman get happy again.
Anyway, that over with and about four years later me wife get pregnant. Me couldn't call mama and beg her nutten because, memba, me oman suppose to dead. One day me cousin call me and tell me to come a country cuz she have a surprise for me. When me and me wife reach, a me granny me buck up inna. Me almost pass out. Just know say she never talk to me again, and me wife nag me bout it every day.