Grandfather got my friend pregnant


July 13, 2018

Dear Pastor,

I am 23 and I have a problem. I am living with my grandfather. He never got married, but when he is asked how many children he has, he would say that he got two.

He is a hard worker. He worked for many years with the government, but he retired about three years ago. He always boasts and says that he is debt free. My grandfather is almost 69.

My mother, who used to live here with him, is now living in the US, so I am alone with him. I am at university.

I have a friend who broke up with her boyfriend and he put her out of his apartment. She didn't have anywhere to go, so she asked if she could stay with me.

I asked my grandfather if she could stay with us and he said yes, if she is a well-behaving girl.

From the time this girl came into this house, she had an eye on my grandfather. She would offer to do things for my grandfather, like make coffee for him in the morning.

At first I thought she was just being good to him, but when I saw that she would wear b****riders and my grandfather wouldn't say anything, I became concerned.

I tried to tell her that when I am not at home, she should go and stay with other people or go to the library, but she ignored me.

I am a woman and I have had my boyfriends. I know when a woman is doing things to attract a man.

I suspected that she got sexually involved with my grandfather and I asked her and she denied it. She even said that my thoughts were filthy.

To cut a long story short, this girl is now two and half months pregnant for my grandfather. I asked her if my grandfather raped her and she said no, and if I want to call it rape, then she was the one who raped him.

I am so ashamed. I want to tell my mother, but she is the type of person who would come to Jamaica and beat the baby out of her.

I asked my grandfather if the child is his and he said if the girl says it is so, then, it is so.

This girl is not sorry that she got pregnant for a man who is almost three times her age. Her ex-boyfriend used to say that she is bad. Now I can see that she really is.

She believes that she would get lots of money from my grandfather, but my mother's name is on my grandfather's account and my mother won't allow her to get anything from it.

I told her that she should not stay at our house anymore, but my grandfather said that she could. Please, pastor, give me your advice because as I see it, this girl is here to destroy our family.


Dear U.M.,

If indeed your grandfather became sexually involved with this young woman and she is now carrying his child, there is not much that you can do.

He is not going to encourage her to leave and live on the streets.

You say that your mother would come and destroy this girl. It would be unwise for your mother to return to Jamaica and abuse your grandfather's woman.

She would have to realise that this young girl is carrying her little sister or brother. You told her that she should leave, but you don't have any authority to tell her to do so.

She will ignore you as long as your grandfather wants her there.

I suggest that you tell your mother what is going on. Of course, it would be better if your grandfather informs her, but if he doesn't, you should tell her.

But, warn her not to have a confrontation with the young woman. What has happened cannot be undone.

Even if she has an abortion, it would not change the fact that she had sexual relations with your grandfather. Let her carry the baby and let your grandfather stand up to his responsibility.

You are hurt, but this girl is still your friend. It does not appear that she has any feeling of remorse, but time will tell what her real motive was. Whatever help you can give to her, please do so.


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