Weird, weird

A disgruntled farmer appears to have been pushed to breaking point after mowing "p*** off" into his field in giant letters.

The very clear message can only be seen from the sky, but it's been picked up on Google Earth in the village of Nettleton.

As reported by the Metro, it's thought that the rude words were carved there by an angry local farmer wanting to warn hot air balloon pilots high above the field - which is on a flight path for rides out of nearby Bristol.

Local retired nurse Janet Freeman, 77, said: "I suspect they could be warning off hot air balloons from landing there.

"Bristol isn't far and they do have all the balloons up throughout the year... It wouldn't be very nice for anyone passing over - they might be upset by it."

However, an ex-local lorry driver has admitted it's the kind of stunt he'd have loved in his youth.

Eric Jeffrey, 83, added: "It's a great bit of fun - the kind of tomfoolery I'd enjoy back in the day.

"It beats this spray paint business - I hope that anybody flying over on a plane or hot air balloon has a chuckle and doesn't get scared away. They've tailored a message for pilots - get off my land."

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A man has estimated he earns PS1,000 a year by complaining about mayonnaise. Public Relations director Chris Own despises what he describes as a "tyrant of a condiment", and claimed he can earn PS90 a month by drawing attention to its unwanted appearance on food his has ordered in a restaurant.

He told the BBC: "The worst culprit is the burger - they always put mayonnaise on burgers.

"Mayonnaise is a tyrant of a condiment, and very arrogant. It thinks it makes everything better but it does not."

The super moaner also hates salad cream - which he has described as "mayo by proxy" - and has even got free pizza after once mentioning the overuse of chilli flakes.

Furthermore, he also said he won PS400 in compensation after complaining about a poorly-fitted oven, and he urged other people around the United Kingdom to do the same.

Strange signals from a galaxy far, far away have left scientists wondering if they were sent by extra terrestrial life.

The baffling radio bursts were received by the Breakthrough Listen (BL) project as teams scanned the skies during a routine hunt for signs of alien life.

Danny Price, a researcher at BL, revealed the group's excitement, and said they were investigating the possible origins of the signal. He said: "There are lots of theories out there... there are some theories that they are from extra terrestrials.

"These theories you have to go on as a last resort."The rare bursts lasted for around a millisecond, and it's said the sound was like an ambulance driving past.

It's not the first time signals have been detected either - there have been around two dozen since the projected started three years ago.

The late Stephen Hawking once signed a letter enthusiastically lending his support to BL, and before his death earlier this year he said he was sure there was intelligent life elsewhere in the universe.

He said: "The idea that we are alone in the universe seems to me completely implausible and arrogant."

The Loch Ness monster has enchanted people for decades, and now scientists could be close to confirming whether or not it exists.

The legend has it that a huge creature lives in the Scottish body of water, and while the idea has captured the imagination there has been no proof that it's a reality.

However, scientists are looking to take DNA samples from the lake at more than 300 spots to see what really lurks beneath.

Amongst those researching the loch is Professor Neil Gemmell from the University of Otago in New Zealand.

As reported by Sky News, he said: "I'm going into this thinking it's unlikely there is a monster, but I want to test that hypothesis.

"What we'll get is a really nice survey of the biodiversity of the Loch Ness."

The samples will come from tiny fragments of DNA left behind by skin, feathers, scales and urine - and it will then be compared with that of known species.