Disgusted by my naughty father-in-law

Dear Pastor,

I am writing to you about my problem. I am 27 years old and I am married. My husband and I have a one-year-old son. My husband lost his job, so it became very difficult for us financially because I am the only one working.

My husband has been trying to get another job but he has not been successful. His mother died and his father is living in a three-bedroom house by himself. The house has a helper’s room. The father has kept the helper,but she does not work every day. She works with him three days per week.

My husband told his father that he would like to live there with him because of our financial situation. The father says he has no objection.

My husband has a brother and a sister but they are living overseas. We moved into the house six months ago. We had to rearrange everything to make the place attractive. His day’s worker didn’t spend much time in cleaning the place. She was supposed to clean, wash and cook enough food that would last him for the days that she does not work.

From the time I started living there, I noticed my husband father was always looking at me and making comments about how beautiful I am, and how his son is lucky to have me. I did not take what he said badly. I used to laugh at what he says. However, one day I was in the kitchen washing the dishes and my husband’s father came into the kitchen and slapped me on my bottom. I told him I did not appreciate that, and he said he was just making fun with me.

I did not say anything to my husband. But another time I was passing him in the living room and he willfully touched me on my bottom. This time, I decided I will complain to his son, and so I did. My husband spoke to him in my presence and asked him why he has to be touching me on my bottom. He said he did not mean anything bad.

However, I can’t help but notice that he constantly looks at me in a very sexy manner.

I asked the day’s worker whether he has ever touched her inappropriately and she said he is very sharp. She said that he has asked her for sex twice but she turned him down.

I told my husband that I don’t want to stay there anymore because I don’t feel free. When we were living on our own, I was able to wear my shorts. Now my husband doesn’t want me to wear shorts anymore while we are living at the same house with his father.

What do you suggest that we should do?

B

Dear B.,

I hope that very soon that your husband and you will be able to move out of this man’s house. He said he was only joking with you when he slapped you the first time. But, whether or not it was a joke, it was not an appropriate thing for this man to do.

He should not expect you to allow him to do with you whatsoever he desires. Therefore, you and your husband should do your best to find another place to live because, evidently, this man believe that he has the right to assault because you are living in his house.

He is a silly old man. Get out of his place as soon as you are able.

Pastor