Lusting for my brother's widow


December 29, 2016

Dear Pastor,

I had a brother who was married. He left two lovely daughters behind. Members of the family decided to help the widow, but what they are giving is not much.

I am not married, but I am working. I have a girlfriend who is living in Canada. She sends money sometimes to help with the children.

My brother was not able to buy a house, so his widow is paying rent. He passed on and did not leave much. His wife is working for a meagre salary, but she is trying.

I find myself loving this woman. We have not gone to bed, but she is always encouraging me to stay over when I visit them, especially on weekends.

I have done it a few times. The last time I was there, I stayed in the children's room and she said to me that next time I should stay in her room and let the children stay by themselves.

I said OK, but I have not gone back at night to visit her because I am afraid to get involved with her.

One day I asked her whether she would get married again and she said yes, she would marry me.

I said, "I beg you pardon?" You did not hear what I said?" She said "Yes, I heard you." She would marry me.


My imagination is running away with me now, Pastor. She knows that I am trying to keep away from her.

She even suggested that we can have a secret relationship and my girlfriend would not have to know.

My reason for writing you is to ask you if it is illegal for a brother to marry his brother's widow.


Dear M.T.,

I cannot encourage you to become sexually involved with your brother's widow. I know your brother is dead and you have become very close to his widow.

I am not surprised that she has gotten to appreciate you because of your kindness to her two children and her.

But if you were to marry her, such a relationship would be frowned upon.

Although this type of relationship might not be illegal in Jamaica and might fall outside consanguinity, it is not considered appropriate or morally right to wed the former wife of your brother.

You may wish to seek the opinion of an attorney.

Before I go, let me say that you should remember that you have a girlfriend and you should not want to do anything that will bring distress upon her.

Please stick with your girlfriend, but continue to help the children of your brother.


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