I fought with my father's young girlfriend


March 15, 2017

Dear Pastor,

I am 19 and living on my own, but my older brother stays with me most of the time. I was living with my father, but a girl my age got involved with him, and she and I could not agree on anything.

We even got into a fight, and my father took her side and told me that nothing would come between him and the girl, because what he wants at nights I couldn't give him and she can.

My father is 61. My brother came and told the girl to leave. He started to throw the girl's belongings outside, but then he stopped because one neighbour heard the noise and told him he could get himself into trouble.

When my father came, he told my brother and I that we would have to leave because the girl hasn't done him anything and that we go out and come home late, and he wants somebody there to take care of him.

Pastor, my brother and I were always there for our father. I have a boyfriend. He has never slept at my father's house. If I wanted to sleep with my boyfriend, I would tell my father that I am not coming home after work.

My brother has his girlfriend and she has never slept at my father's house, either. We respect our father.

When our father told us that he has a girlfriend and how old she is, we told him that she was too young for him, but he did not listen. She does not work. She eats and drinks as she pleases. Even things that we buy for ourselves, she uses.

I have my sanitary pads and she used them without my permission. When I talked about it, she started to curse me. That is what caused the dispute between the four of us.


My boyfriend told me that I should not follow that girl and lose respect for my father because, very soon, when she can't get all that she wants, she would leave him.

We believe that dad told her about some insurance money he should get because he is the beneficiary of my mother's insurance. That is what the insurance man told my brother and I. Every day she watches TV and play Cash Pot.


Dear K.P.,

Your father has made his choice. He wanted a woman in his life. He got one, and he chose a very young woman. I could understand your brother and yourself have tried to show your father that he is destroying his family by having an intimate relationship with such a young woman.

But I suppose that your brother and you would not understand how much this woman thrills your daddy.

Perhaps she is doing things that he has never experienced before and he likes that. So, there is nothing your brother and you could say that would make him end the relationship he is having with her.

So, what I am about to say, you may not like, but I will say it nevertheless. Leave your father alone. He will not hear, so he will crash. And after he has crashed, you and your brother should be prepared to pick him up and help him to mend his broken bones because, by that time, his sweet, sweet lady would be gone.

Poor father. I hope when he wakes up and comes to himself, he will still have enough money to help you, his children, to bury him when the time comes.


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