I miss my ex-boyfriend


April 06, 2017

Dear Pastor

The night was cold and I was alone, so I decided to write to you. I have a boyfriend. I have been trying to reach him but he is not answering his phone.

I don't trust men any more. I was with a man for three years. We were planning to get married and he dumped me for another woman.

I come from a poor family but he did not care. His parents did not accept me but his brother and sister accepted me. When I realised that his parents did not accept me, I stopped going anywhere with him if they were going to be there.

He is very close to his parents and he works in the family business.

Things were not going right in the relationship. I sensed he wanted to go. He did not like how I dressed sometimes and he did not like my drinking.

I drink and go out with my girlfriends to clubs, and he didn't like that.

Once I went to a party and all the girls dressed in white shorts. It was a private party and my boyfriend thought that my shorts were too short and he made a fuss over it, especially when I was dancing.

So I told him, "okay, let us call it a day," and we broke up.

I am here thinking about him tonight because I can't find my new boyfriend and I know that he is with another woman. If I call my old boyfriend now, he would be here at the snap of my fingers.

When we were breaking up, he told me that if I needed him, I should always call him.

Pastor, the people with money in Jamaica are very prejudiced and the people who are suffering are black people. I like my boyfriend. He is so different. He tells me that I can go wherever I want.

He is different from the guy whose parents did not like me. He is quiet. Since I met him I can have a bank account and he pays my rent.

But why was he not answering his phone tonight? I need him. I am 23 and he is 40. Sometimes I feel I should just migrate and forget everybody.


Dear R.P.

I suggest that you stay with your present boyfriend. You are not sure that he has another woman. You suspect that he does. You were trying to reach him but you were unable to do so.

Perhaps when you see him he would have a very good explanation. Do not yield to the temptation to call your ex-boyfriend to come over to see you or to pick you up. You know that both of you broke up.

If you have questions about the relationship and you are not happy with the way your present boyfriend is treating you, ask your boyfriend if he would go with you to see a family counsellor.


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