Worried my friend is going to get pregnant


April 07, 2017

Dear Pastor,

I am 14 years old. When I was 11, my grandmother didn't like to see me reading your column. She told me that I would grow up too fast if I read what people write to you and what you tell them to do.

My father told her that she should not tell me not to read your column because he would not like to know that I strayed.

Pastor, I have to be fanning off boys. People think that I am over 16. I would like to be a paediatrician. I am studying very hard.

I have a friend who is also my neighbour. She is 16 and she used me as her pass to meet one of her boyfriends.

We went to the library, but I did not know that she was going to leave me there and go out with her boyfriend.

I only found out what she had planned when she was at the library. She told me a man was coming to pick her up.

When the man came, he called her and she left her phone with me and told me that if the phone rings I should answer. If it is her parents, I should tell them that she was in the ladies' room and she would call back. They did not call.

She came back after about an hour and a half and brought me lunch. She said that this man likes her and wants to have sex with her, but she is a virgin.

So he told her that he would take his time when he is having sex with her. This guy is 33.

I am a virgin. I told my friend that she should stop going with this man because he may get her pregnant, but she is still going with him and he is still begging her for sex.

But she told me that she hasn't made up her mind as yet.

What can I tell her?


Dear A.C.,

I am glad that you have been reading my column from an early age. I am sure that your grandmother meant well when she expressed her displeasure in your reading my column.

She meant well, but she was so very wrong. Your father knew better and I am sure he believes that by reading, you would learn from what others have written and my responses.

Your friend is heading for trouble if she continues to see or to have a relationship (even casually) with this 33-year-old man.

You should not allow her to use you to cover up for her when she goes out with this man. If anything goes wrong, her parents may likely question you about her whereabouts.

Therefore, you need to tell her that she should not use you as a pass to go to her boyfriend, so to speak.

Perhaps this girl is in need. You haven't said so, but if she is so eager to meet with her boyfriend, it is not just a matter of getting lunch from him, it was much more than that and that is why he felt bold enough to ask her for sex.

I warn you, do not go out with her. If both of you are going to the library, you should make it known to her that it is the library and the library only.


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