Don't know how to tell my father I'm pregnant


May 05, 2017

Dear Pastor,

I am 26 and I am living with my father. I am working, but my father has just retired. I love him because he is a good father to me.

I came to live with him when I was 15. But before I came to live with him, he supported me.

When I was living with my mother, my stepfather put 'questions' to me and when I told my mother, she did nothing about it.

When I told my father he called her, and she told him that she didn't believe. So my father told her to send me to live with him.

I went to college and I didn't have to get student loan; my father paid my tuition. He and I have an understanding that I will give him back some of the money when I am able to do so.

But I am having a problem with him at the moment and I am ashamed about it. I have a boyfriend. He is 23 and my father knows him.

My boyfriend can come to the house; my father is not against that.

On Easter Monday, my father left for the beach and my boyfriend came over to see me two hours after my father left. We decided to have sex. My boyfriend was lying down on my bed.

caught naked

I went into the bathroom to shower and came out in the nude, and just as I was to go into my room my father showed up. I could not even run. All I said was, "Sorry, dad".

He knew my boyfriend was there because he saw his shoes in the living room. I put on my clothes and I told my boyfriend that my father was home; of course, he heard his voice.

After I put on my clothes and came into the living room, my father seemed angry and he made an ugly comment. Then he asked if this is what I do when he is not around.

I told him I was not going to do anything, my boyfriend was only taking some rest. He asked me if I took him for a fool.

Now, Pastor, I am pregnant and my boyfriend is still living at home and I don't want to leave my father.

I told my boyfriend that he should tell my father that I am pregnant, but he insists that I should be the one to do so. I have a good job. I make more money than my boyfriend.

I didn't want to get pregnant now. I don't want to leave to go and pay rent. I don't know how you see it, Pastor. Please give me your advice.


Dear M.P.,

You have enjoyed living with your dad. He did the correct thing when he took you from your mother. Your father is a good man.

Concerning the incident between your boyfriend and yourself, I can always say that you took a chance and got caught.

I use the word 'caught' because you did not think that your father would return so soon and that you had the house for yourself.

Let this incident teach you a lesson; whenever your father is going to be away from his house and your boyfriend is planning to visit, you should advice your father of his coming.

It is his house. He can go and come as he pleases.

You shouldn't be so careless as to invite your boyfriend into your room and you go into the bathroom to wash yourself, while your boyfriend was waiting on you.

Your father is not a fool. He knew that both of you were preparing to have sex. Your father did not condemn you because he knew that you are an adult and you were probably sexually active.

Now that you are pregnant, it is your responsibility to inform your father. The young man can do so, but you and your father are very close. So work up some courage and tell him.

Discuss the whole matter with your father. I wish you well.


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