My man didn't tell me about his five kids


May 08, 2017

Dear Pastor,

I am a regular reader of your column. I am a Christian and I grew up in a Saturday church. But when I met my boyfriend, he used to take me out on Friday nights and buy jerked pork and festival. I used to eat it because I had stopped attending church.

My boyfriend does not eat chicken, so I never forced him to eat chicken. He was living alone, so I would stay over with him on a Friday and sometimes stay until Sunday, then go home on Sunday evenings.

My sister and I rented a place and we shared the rent. But when my boyfriend and I became serious with each other, I told my sister that I was going to live with him.

She suggested that all three of us could live in one house and the rent would be cheaper. My boyfriend did not agree, so I left my sister and she got one of our co-workers to live with her. That was a big mistake. The first week I came to live with my boyfriend, he told me that he has five children. I told him that I would not stay with him because I couldn't live with a man who has so many children and we don't have any together as yet

One evening when I came from work, I saw another woman in the house. My boyfriend told me that she was one of his babymothers and she won't go back until the following day because she came from the country to see him. I took up my bag and left the house and went to stay with my sister. Now he is calling and telling me that he is sorry and I should come back.

Pastor, do you think I should go? I am disappointed in this man. I hope I am not pregnant for him because by now my period should have come.


Dear O.S.,

This relationship did not start on solid ground. Both of you did not level with each other. You compromised your religious beliefs by eating whatever he bought for you. You were a Seventh-day Adventist, but you ate pork when you met this man. Then you agreed to go and live with him instead of insisting that he should marry you first.

When the man felt that you were comfortable, he decided to tell you the truth by telling you the number of children he has. Then he disrespected you by allowing one of his babymothers to come and sleep at the house while you were living with him.

I don't think I should talk much more by telling you how I feel about this relationship. Suffice it to say, leave this man. End the relationship with him and don't look back. He has made a fool out of you.


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