Parents gone 'farin', kids suffer

March 21, 2016

Nuff time, people a look fi greener pastures fi a better life fi dem and dem pickney and automatically a farin dem think 'bout. Some go 'big farin', while others go 'likkle farin' all with the hope of securing better opportunities where they can provide for their families.

It is true that many persons have benefited financially from opting to go overseas, being able to accomplish that which they could not or think they could not in their own country. Sometimes when people feel like dem back against the wall and they have no way out, they look to the 'Almighty Farin'!


emotionally empty


Some people choose to fly out because a desperation, while others choose it because dem 'falla fashin' and if a egg dem fi inna di red! But going to farin also has its drawbacks and problems. Many times, even though a di pickney nuff seh dem ago "look life" for, they are the ones who suffer in the grand scheme of things.

Most times, the children are left emotionally empty and traumatised because the parent is not there. Fi reassure them, help them and just to be there for them. Yes, it nice fi can buy dem the latest sneakers, gadgets and games but 'things' cannot substitute for the unconditional love of a mother and/or father. Nuff time di same people dem who dem lef' in charge a dem pickney, ill-treat dem and damage dem! Some a dem only agree fi keep the child as an additional source of income and not in the best interest of the child. So many people send down dem pickney lunch money and maintenance money and the pickney don't receive it.

Dem all have the people dem pickney like slave a clean up dem dutty house, while fi dem pickney a live like king and queen offa di money weh a come from farin! Many 'barrel pickney' have a whole heap a psychological issues because nuff a demm ... a dem raise demself.

If you're free, single, disengaged and no have no pickney yuh free fi tek up yuhself and all go Abu Dhabi or Africa go 'look life'! However, when there are children involved, much more thought has to go into that decision. At the end of the day, sometimes it better yuh stay wid yuh pickney and grow dem and treat dem how you want.

Yuh pickney dem fi be yuh handbag - dat mean anyweh yuh deh a deh so dem deh. Sometimes it's best to grow your child/children on a modest income than leave dem fi go 'look life' at the expense of their lives. One slice a bread wid yuh good clean pickney better than a whole a bread with a damaged child. Everything has to be balanced and done in the best interest of the child.


bond or connection


After the life done look, the pickney dem grow outta di parents hand and the time gone can never be regained. There are instances where the child refers to their mother or father by their first name and not mommy or daddy because they don't have a bond or connection with them. By the time some want to play the parent role, it is too late. The pickney dem done form dem personality and views of life. Some a dem go to other sources to seek love and attention that they lack, some are affected in school, while others are constantly depressed.

Children must be monitored and made to feel that they are loved. They can be loved from across the ocean, but that bond has to be strong and maintained. Don't just drop dem off a people yard and leave dem up to the world to mould dem because, when yuh come back from farin the pickney weh yuh end up wid might pain yuh heart!

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