Woman runs away with friend's borrowed hair
Yoggo Yoggo Yow TamFam. Waa gwaan? Mi deh ya a chill inna Obama Lan same way ... an a watch di one Missa 'Chump' a gwaan wid him foolishniss. Big up all Ragashanti Live and Tambourine Radio listeners.
Mix-up time, some hair mix-up:
Hair Teef Hairdresser Dem
Mi seh people ... mi getting reports bout a dirty practice mongst some hairdressers. Dem tell dem clients fi bring een a certain amount a hair ('bundles' if a high quality hair), then wen dem a put een di hair, dem a teef some. Apparently, is a ting weh a gwaan long time, yeah, di hair teef hairdresser dem. Pon di oda side we haffi bless up di hairdresser dem weh always return left-ova hair to dem clients. See it deh ... all is not lost ... at least some decency an fairness still inna di bizniz.
Borrow di Hair an Len it Out
Raga, big up di girl weh borrow hair fi wear goh party. Afta she goh di party she len di hair to har fren. Har fren run weh wid di hair an gaan live a Florida. Now di owner fi di hair a walk an a look fi the girl weh borrow it fi beat har.
Big up to di man weh buy expensive hair put inna a gyal head. Den one day him an a man ketch up an di man cuss him say "guweh!! Caa yuh buy expensive hair gi gyal an wen di same gyal a gimmi a backass, a me a draw out di hair outa har head!!" Waaaiiiieee!! Mi hear seh di man get bex an rush di gyal fi tek out di hair offa har head, but di gyal wriggle weh fram him an run weh, den WhatsApp him seh a ongle wukliss man buy woman hair an tek it back. DWL.
Parson an Him Hair Ting
Big up to di parson wife who order a hairdresser fi come a har yard fi do har hair. She tell di hairdresser di different types a hair weh she waan she bring. Di hairdresser did find it strange di combination a hair weh di parson wife did request. Anyways, wen she done di parson wife hair, di parson wife explain to di hairdresser dat di oda likkle bit a afro hair weh she oreder was fi put een a har husband head. Yeah, di parson have a weird likkle hair issue weh one area a him head stay bad ... soh him neatly fix up da paat deh wid false hair. Look like him did already have smaddy weh dweet, but for wateva reason him an da smaddy deh naa deal again soh a so come him mek him wife page di hairdresser fi come deal wid di matta fi him.
Mi neva know say yuh have man weh wear false hair dem way deh. Now people up ya a Obama Lan a tell mi say a real ting doe, say yuh have a few man a road a beat false hair inna di same way di woman dem wear it. But big up di pastor still ... may your hair an head be forever blessed ... in Jesus name.
Dye Hair drama
Big up to di woman who nuh shave dung deh soh, an all dye di hair dung deh. Den goh rinse a propa sort out pon a browning man. Wen di man a put on di lashings pon har di dye goh rub off pon him instrument. Him now convince seh a obeah di woman a wuk an did put 'black oil' inna har juju fi tie him!!
Massa God, do, if yuh nuh busy, come dung ya likkle bit come bax dung some a dem eediat people ya ... caa Jah know, dem head nuh deh ya!! Mi cyaan bada enoh!
Anyways, mi haffi leggo ya now. Sen mi unu mix-up dem at firstname.lastname@example.org. See unu nex week Thursday same place ya soh inna di STAR. Bless up unu self straight.