Wifey friend beat up 'bunnawoman'
Wooooiiiiieeee!!! Waa gwaan TamFam??? Unu good?? Bless up all 'Ragashanti Live' and Tambourine Radio listeners. Big up unu self.
Well ... we haffi give tanks say Hurricane Matthew neva affect Jamaica wid a direct hit ... even though there was whole heap a rain associated wid it. An mi hear say a bag a mix-up rinse during di associated rains. Unu link mi wid dem mek mi know wat a gwaan. In di meantime pre da mix-up ya:
Up ya a Obama Lan, a bredda married but have a bunnawoman weh him link regularly. Is also a man weh nuh like wear common clothes, him like wen him clothes dem well different fram wa everybaddy else a wear. Anyways, dis one time him goh check di bunnawoman an did wear a shell-dung hat, one a dem hat deh weh him get dem fi mek it wid something unique pon it. Yeah, him did have it design wid supm pon it weh noh exist nowhere else. Soh him drap pon di bunnawoman ends, sen on some propa slappings pon har, lef a ting wid har, put on back him clothes an cut. But wen him cut, him did lef him boasy hat a di bunnawoman yaad. Di nex few days afta dat, di bunnawoman tek it up pon har self fi a beat di hat every day. Yeah, she hot out inna di man boasy unique hot eeeeeveryday.
Soh one day wen di bunnawoman deh a road inna di man hat, di man wife a drive an goh see har inna it. Di wife circle back inna har car an staat trail har, while at di same time a call one a har hairdresser fren an a tell har wa she a see. Di hairdresser call one a fi har fren an di two a dem goh dung weh di wife deh. Di three a dem trail di bunnawoman goh a har yaad an siddung outside inna dem car a chat an a wait fi di bunnawoman touch road again. Dem neva did haffi wait long. A woman walk up to di bunnawoman yaad an she come out an walk weh wid di woman. Di wife, di hairdresser an di oda woman staat falla dem. Di bunnawoman an fi har fren dem walk goh dung a one park weh whole heap a ppl did deh a one barbeque.
Di wife an har paary dem watch di bunnawoman an har fren di whole time till dem a leave. Wen dem reach pon a road weh emptyish, di hairdresser an har fren move to di bunnawoman an ask har weh she get da hat deh?? Di wife neva goh ova deh. Di bunnawoman did shock an tun eediat - but staat trang up an a ask di hairdresser what is it to you? Di hairdresser grab har up an ask di question again. Same time di bunnawoman get bringle an staat gwaan wicked, fi di hairdresser let har go.
A deh soh di hairdresser fren jus' jump een an staat beat out di bunnawoman nastiniss. Di bunnawoman fren get fraid an run weh an' a bawl out, "Help, help, help!!" All di while di hairdresser an har fren still a beat di bunnawoman. Bare bax an tump an drag hair pon di bunnawoman! An di whole time dem a beat har, dem a tell har fi lef people husband. Dem wap har up wicked an tek weh di hat fram har, an mek she know if dem eva find out say she still a dash out pon di married man, dem a goh come back fi har. Afta dat, di hairdresser an har fren link up back wid di wife an di whole a dem cut.
Afta di bunnawoman get har beaten, she call di husband right away an tell him wa happen an tell him fi call him wife mek di three a dem meet an sort out di issue. Di husband tell har fi calm dung an ask har if a mad she mad, a chat bout dem fi meet up wid him wife?? Di bunnawoman say anyhow him nuh call di meeting she a goh police goh report wa dem do har. Di husband ask har if him wife did de deh?? She say no. Him ask har if she know di woman dem who beat har?? She say no. Den him say, "OK, gwaan goh mek yuh report to di police" ... den him hang up. A deh soh di bunnawoman realise say even if she mek di report to di police, nuttin naa come outa it - caa di wife neva de deh, an she nuh know nuttin bout di hairdresser an har fren.
Fram dat, di bunnawoman hol har cawna an neva again hype a road inna anyting fi di husband. And yeah, di husband still hol di link wid di bunnawoman, but him stay married to him wife.
Awright ... a leggomentz again. Sen mi unu mix-up dem at email@example.com. See unu nex week Thursday, same place ya soh inna THE STAR. Bless up unu self.