80-y-o claims nurses wanted his body
What's up my peeps?! Lawd is how unuh a manage the heat cause I cya deal with it at all! No sah the time never haffi hot so! Anyways just give thanks we alive to experience it!
I was at a little birthday get together for a man everybody called 'Uncle Eu-Eu' short for Eustace, who was celebrating his 80th birthday! Everybody was in good spirits especially since he returned home from the hospital the night before. Everybody knows when people get to that age all sorts of things tend to malfunction, from the feet to the stomach to the head and a bag a things! Eustace McLean was no exception but his spirit was high. He put out all his candles in one blow, cut his cake with his wife of 30 years (Aunty Yvonne), and even sipped non-alcoholic champagne as toasts were said. He was happy!
He is always telling people stories and this time was no different as he recalled his uncanny experience with the nurses at the university hospital the night day before.
"Di gal dem ketch me and a tell me fi go lay dung, so me tell dem me nah lay dung but a force dem a force me and me nuh wah lay dung! Dem start shub shub me and me chuck dem. Dem seh me shouldn't chuck dem so dem shub me and me thump dung one!" he said as laughter exploded! (This man don't weigh 130 lbs). I asked him if it was a male nurses and he said, "A pure woman! One a come in front a me and me just use me foot and gi her one rahtid stamp inna her chest!"
"Me never know a so yuh bad!" I said.
"Who? Me McLean! Ask me bredda bout me. Five a dem (nurses). Fus a did three den two more come join cause me bad nuh rahtid. Cause me chuck dem, dem never expect dat through dem a nurse dem think me did ago tek dem pushing yuh understand, but me nuh tek it me chuck dem back! Dem seh go and lay dung. Me seh me nah lay dung. Dem seh you have to, me seh watch me! She chuck me dung and me chuck har back dung on di bed! Everybody dideh a watch!"
He said they tied him down on the four bed post so I asked him what happened to the nurse that was in charge. He said she was there a holding him down as well.
"Why were they holding you down though?" I asked.
HOT DEM HOT
He replied: "It look like you don't understand. Dem seh dem want supmn! Yuh nuh understand when a woman seh them want supmn? A hot dem hot. Me couldn't go want supmn in a broad day light when whole heap a people dideh. People a pass enuh but it look like dem nuh care! Dem wah tie me dung fi ride me! Me tell dem untie mi cause when me get up back a murder!"
LMAO. I couldn't contain myself as I listened and laughed. He said he asked them if that's how they treated people in the hospital. He said they tied him down twice. Once he freed himself and the other time his wife came to his rescue. He said he never got any injection at any point.
He said one nurse insisted on washing his 'thing' but he told her he would do it since he was doing it since he was a boy. "Yuh wah see how she a look pon it when me drop it in the bowl. Yuh nuh know which one did want me first? The head one! Is true sumn enuh me cya believe it happen to me. Dem think me soft bout dem a push me. Me just chuck dem so ... and seh go weh!"
The way he said it and gestured made me laugh. Man old but him not cold at all! Walk good peeps!