I cheated on my man for $600


March 17, 2016

Dear Pastor,

I am 17 years old. I am living at home with my parents. I have a boyfriend but he is not very helpful to me. He gives me money once in a while and I find myself needing more money all the time.

Sometimes I ask him for money and he tells me that he does not have it and he wants to know if I am a gold- digger. I borrowed $2,000 from a man. He lives in the same yard where my boyfriend lives. I paid him back $1,400. I told him to wait because I could not the rest right now. He told me to borrow it from my boyfriend. I told him that my boyfriend doesn't have it.

One week passed and he asked me again, but I didn't have it. I went to spend the weekend with my boyfriend. After my boyfriend left for work and the man's girlfriend left the man said to me we could settle the matter another way. He suggested that I give him sex for the $600. I told him no. This man did not stop pestering me for sex. So I went into his room and had sex with him. I don't know what he was eating Pastor, but he had sex with me for about half an hour. I tried to push him away and told him that sex was worth more than $600. When he discharged, his penis was still hard. He gave me $1,000 and said that I don't need to worry about the $600 that I owed him.

I went over to my boyfriend's house and I considered what had just happened. My boyfriend had left for work and he did not leave a dollar for me. I took the money and bought saltfish and ackee and cooked for my boyfriend and myself. I don't want to live this kind of life. Every time that I see this man in the yard and I see his girlfriend, I say to myself that I should be his girlfriend. He takes good care of her. All my boyfriend wants from me is sex and to clean his room and wash his clothes. I asked him what is he doing with his money and he said that things are hard with the boss, so he is not getting much pay, and what he makes he has to divide it between his mother and me.

Please, tell me what to do. I need money and I know this other man can give me money, but he wants more sex. Tell me what to do.


Dear B.G.

Whenever a person borrows money, that person is under obligations to repay the money, so the lender of the $2,000 was within his rights to insist that you pay all of the money. It was only $600. He could have left that with you but he chose not to do so.

He wanted sex from you as payment. You could have insisted that you would not sell yourself, but you yielded to his demand and for an hour and a half he had you under agony. And when he was fully satisfied, he gave you $1,000 more.

What would have happened if your boyfriend had returned and discovered that you were in this man's house having sex with him? And what would happen, even now, if he were to find out that you slept with him and the following morning you had sex with his neighbour?

He would curse you and probably call you a slut. And the relationship between the both of you would have ended right there.

You need money. Evidently, your parents are not in the position to support you well and your boyfriend is unable to help you much; therefore, you need a job. You have to be willing to do any type of job that is legal because, at 17, you are probably not trained in any particular skill.

You have started out wrong by selling your body for money. I know that you did not mean for that to happen, but it has happened due to your naivety and the wickedness of this man from whom you had borrowed the money. I hope that you have learnt from your mistake.

Don't borrow money from any man. If your parents cannot give you any money, do without or try and work for it, even if you have to do babysitting.


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