My man's penis is too big

by

May 19, 2016

Dear Pastor

Greetings in the name of Jesus. I am writing to tell you how much I enjoy reading your columns. I am 18 years old. I graduated from high school, but I am unemployed. I have a boyfriend, and he is the one who is supporting me. My father said that he has spent enough money on me, so I must help myself. My boyfriend loves me very much, and while I was in school, we did not have sex. But since I left school, we have been having sex often.

He has a very big penis and he is very rough at times. When he took my virginity, I was not able to walk properly for about three days. I had to stay in bed. My mother knew what was going on. I had to tell her the truth, but my father did not know. When my father asked why I was not up and around, my mother told him that I was in pain because I was seeing what girls always see every month.

I want to be a nurse. My boyfriend is going to send me back to school. He is 39 years old and he is always warning me not to keep another man with him. He said that his friends told him that he shouldn't send me to school, but that I should get a job and pay for my subjects myself.

Do you think my boyfriend is too old for me? My father is 10 years older than my mother, so my boyfriend is much older than I am. Pastor, don't tell me he is too old for me because age is just a number. I don't have to worry about getting money from him. He makes it his duty to give it to me.

L.E.

Dear L.E.

Stop fooling yourself, age is much more than a number. This man is 21 years older than you. However, I am not here suggesting that he is too old for you. That really is not my business. That is up to the both of you. Some girls have married men who are by far their seniors and they have had successful relationships. On the other hand, some of these girls, after they have gotten older, cheated and have declared that the men were too old for them.

Many women have gotten into those kinds of relationships because of what they can get from these men. They get house, money and a measure of security, and they facilitate the men with sex.

Your father said that he could not help you beyond high school. Many fathers have taken that position. Thank God for those who have not. Some men would give their last cent to their children to attend university. If your father had made the sacrifice to continue to support you, you probably would have not been sexually ravished by this man who is now your boyfriend. He did not rape you, but he is very large, according to you, and he has no mercy on you when he is having sex with you. Your mother knew that she could not have reported him to the police because it was not a matter of rape. It was consensual sex, so she kept quiet about it and kept it from your father.

I suggest that you go and see a gynaecologist, discuss your problems with him or her and ask for advice. Concerning whether you should accept this man's offer to send you to school, I see no reason why you should not. He is already your man. Your parents know him and the relationship is not a secret, so the family should discuss everything together relating to you and this man. I wish you every success.

Pastor

Other Tell Me Pastor Stories