My ex-boyfriend wants back his stove, fridge


July 12, 2016

Dear Pastor,

I am having a problem. I am a 26-year-old woman and I have one child and was pregnant.

The man who got me pregnant did not tell me that he was married. I found that out after I told him that I was pregnant.

He told me to abort it because he was married and he wouldn't want his wife to know that he had impregnated another woman.

I was shocked. I asked him why he did not tell me that he was married and he told me that if he had told me I probably wouldn't have wanted him.

I had an abortion. After the abortion, I told him not to come back to see me. He did not believe that I was serious. One night he came to the house about 10 p.m. and I refused to let him in.

I also told him that my brother was staying with me. I didn't open the door. I thought he had left, but when my brother woke up at about 5 a.m. and was ready to leave and I opened the door, this man showed up. He had waited outside all night to see if I was talking the truth.

I was very upset and I cursed him and we almost got into a fight. He told me that if I didn't want anything to do with him, I should give him back the stove and the refrigerator he bought for me. I told him I was not giving them back to him. My friends say I shouldn't give them back.

Every day he calls me, asking for them. I don't know what to do. I do have a man who is interested in me, but I am afraid to go into any relationship with another man so soon.


Dear C.R.,

I suggest that you give back this man the stove and the refrigerator and allow him to go about his business. By returning the refrigerator and stove, you would have cut all ties with him.

A good man would not ask you to return the things that he gave to you while both of you were having a relationship. But if this man is using a refrigerator and a stove to force you to continue having an intimate relationship with him, you should let him have them.

Make sure that you get help from the police or a couple of men who can witness that you gave them back to him.

I am sorry you terminated the pregnancy, but I don't condemn you for the action you took. This man deceived you. He is shameless.

He stayed outside your house that night when he visited you. You told him that your brother was there. He did not believe that it was your brother that was there. He believed it was another man, so he stayed around all night to see when the man was leaving and who he was.

Ask your brother and other relatives to help you to buy a refrigerator and a stove. Be careful what you take from men in the future. Don't be in a hurry to go into another relationship. Give yourself time.

Try and get to know the background of the man who is showing interest in you.


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