My sister stole my man


July 27, 2016

Dear Pastor

I am a 25-year-old woman and I need your help and advice. My father has four children; two boys and two girls. My mother had one child with my father and that was the reason why he married her.

My father used to live with a woman. The only child she had with him died. My father took his three children he had with different women, and all of us live together.

He did not believe in spanking his children. My stepmother says that he spoiled us. He worked day and night to support and educate us. He is a farmer.

I am having a problem because I am the second child for my father. The first child is a boy. The one who followed me is a girl. I love all my siblings, but right now I am fighting off bad feelings I have for my sister.

I met a guy a year ago and we have been talking. I told my sister about him. I showed him to her on Facebook. Would you believe that my sister got involved with this guy?

I noticed that anytime I said something to her about him she went silent. I did not know they were communicating. I did not meet the guy in person, but my sister went behind my back and dated him.

I found out about it and I asked the guy and he admitted it. He said that she showed more interest in him than I did and he still loves me, but he loves her too. I hate what my sister did to me.

The guy wants us to meet and talk. I told him I will think about it. Do you think I should meet with him? I feel hurt and I am crying. My sister does not seem to care how I feel.


Dear N.T.,

Your sister doesn't feel that she has done anything wrong. She is probably pretending that she hasn't done anything wrong. She could not be serious.

You told your sister about this young man who was interested in you, and what she did was unethical. She became friendly with him. And unknowing to you, she dated him. How could that be right?

When this guy asked her for a date, she should have told you, and nothing she says to you can make it right. The young man knew too that what they were doing was wrong. He should have told you that he was taking out your sister.

You should refuse to go to see him. He is a hypocrite. Frankly, he is behaving as a playboy when he tells you that he loves both of you. He might be speaking the truth, but he could not love the both of you in the same manner. He has to love one of you more than the other.

You don't need to fight over him. I further suggest to you, my dear lady, that you treat your sister with respect even if she fails to do the same to you.

Do not give the impression that you are in competition with her. Let your sister have him. However, I doubt that the relationship between them is going to last. He is not a man of principle and she will soon find out.


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