I want my boyfriend to stop smoking


December 09, 2016
A cigarette smoker.

Dear Pastor,

My problem is that my boyfriend and I have been together for more than three years. I love him so much, and I know he really loves me too.

I am a Christian and I don't intend on having sex until I am married, but some of the things he's doing doesn't please me.

He smokes a lot. Before we met, he used to do all these things - like going to parties and so forth; but since we became friends, he has stopped doing some of these things.

He said he is willing to come to church with me and he wants us to get married, but I don't want to get married until he is baptised and stops smoking.

Pastor, I understand that it's hard for him as a sinner to stop doing all these sinful things in a short period of time.

The Bible speaks about being unequally yoked. When we started dating, I didn't know much about my Bible, but now I do and I don't want to continue living my life to displease God.

Sometimes I feel like giving up on this relationship, but we have been through so many rough times that it's hard for me to give up on him.

He is the first guy that ever made me feel so complete. His pay is not much, but I understand and work with what he has to give and whenever I get money, if I can help him, I do so.

I am afraid that if he accompanies me to church, the church members will say I should stop talking to him because he is not a Christian.

Initials withheld

Dear .....,

Concerning your boyfriend, you say that he is a good man and I believe you. He is a smoker and that bothers you.

Please do not condemn him but at the same time, you have a responsibility to remind him that smoking whether it be cigarettes or marijuana, is not good for his health.

The American Heart Association has published some facts that should not be ignored. You may discuss them with your gentleman.

You probably know about the relationship between smoking and lung cancer, but did you know smoking is also linked to heart disease, stroke and other chronic lung diseases?

Smoking can also increase your risk for cancer of the bladder, throat and mouth, kidneys, cervix and pancreas.


Smoking is the most preventable cause of death in the US. Almost one-third of deaths from coronary heart disease are attributable to smoking and second-hand smoke.

Smoking is linked to about 90 per cent of lung cancer cases in the US.

Cigarette smoke contains more than 5,000 chemical components and hundreds of them are harmful to human health, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention.

Second-hand smoke is a serious health hazard for non-smokers, especially children.

Second-hand tobacco smoke contributes to about 34,000 premature heart disease deaths and 7,300 lung cancer deaths.

I hope that these facts on smoking would help your boyfriend to see that he is playing with his life and he should quit the habit.

You mentioned what the Bible says about being unequally yoked. I do not wish to comment on that because my response to your letter is already long.

Suffice to say, you should not ignore the advice concerning relationship from the Bible.

Please let me hear from you. I would be praying for you.


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