I am the boss' secret lover


June 26, 2017

Dear Pastor,

I am having a problem. I am 35 years old and in a relationship with a man who is 40 years old. He was married to one of my cousins. They didn't have children, but she died. She was not a near relative. My father told me I shouldn't be concerned about that, but I still wonder if it is right.

I have one child and I am raising this child on my own because his father doubted whether he got me pregnant, and from the time he expressed his doubt, I did not care to have him say any more.

My boy is seven years old now and he is the spiltting image of his father. His father's people are trying to get me to forgive him, and to allow my son to get to know them. But I will not send him to stay with any one of them. The time will come when he will have to make his own decision about that.

This man, who is in my life, is a challenge to me. He has helped me to pay down on a home, but we are not living, together. He got me pregnant but I had a miscarriage. You may think that I am wicked, but I was glad I had the miscarriage because I was not mentally prepared to have another child.

I am using protection, but he does not know. He is anxious for us to get married, but wants me to get pregnant again. He is very demanding and I cannot deal with that. I am testing his love for me. I told him that I need a new car for my birthday, which is December 24. Every time I talk to him about the car, he reminds me that I should get pregnant before the end of the year.


Pastor, let me tell you the truth. Where I am working, I am in love with the man who is in charge of the company, and when I compare the love I have for my boss and the love I have for this other guy, I love my boss more. No one knows that we are lovers; we are going together for three years. Whatever he gives to me, he gives me in cash. He could buy me a car at the snap of his fingers, but the other guy would find out. So, I am pressuring the other guy to buy the car.

Sometimes I am not sure if I am in love with him, but I know he loves me and would love me to get pregnant for him again. My boss does not want any children. He always has condoms with him. He thinks that he is the only man in my life. I know that the one who wants to marry me suspects that I have another guy and that is why he is not giving me space.


Dear H.S.,

You are too greedy and you are ungrateful, too. Here is a man who has helped you to purchase property and who has done everything to show you that he loves you, and what have you been doing in return? You have been cheating on him. You got pregnant by him and you had a miscarriage. Was it really a miscarriage or did you do an abortion?

I could hear you cursing me, but frankly, I don't care because if you can be talking about wanting a car from this man, while at the same time you are having a very serious relationship with your boss, I believe you can do anything. You are a double-faced woman.

This man should never buy you a car. I repeat, you are greedy. I will not mention the type of job that your boss does, but I will urge you to make up your mind. Keep one man. Your boss does not show any inclination to marry you. The other man is eager to marry and eager to get you pregnant again. If you know you don't love him enough to have him as a husband, tell him so and stop taking his money. Let him go his way and find a woman who loves him enough to marry him.


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