Can't give up either of my two girlfriends


July 14, 2017

Dear Pastor,

I would like you to settle this matter for me. I have two girlfriends and I told the two of them the truth. Both of them say that they love me and I love them, too.

I am living with my grandmother. She loves one of them and that one can come to the house at any time, but she does not like the other. The one my grandmother likes is a natural girl.

She doesn't like to wear make-up and my grandmother likes that. When she is coming to my grandmother to look for me, she does not wear pants.

The other girl wears heavy make-up. She is of a light complexion and she has tattoos on her hand and on her back.

One evening I picked her up, as we were going to the country, I had to pick up something at the house and she had on shorts. She came out of the car and followed me in. My grandmother was very upset and told me that this is not how she grew me, and that I should know that I should not bring that kind of woman to her house. I promised her that it would not happen again.

Pastor, the girl my grandmother loves is a sweet girl, but her parents are poor and she depends on me for everything.


This other girl has a good job and from time to time she helps me financially because I have three children, so by the time I give their mothers money, I don't have much for myself. It is this girl who helps me out.

I am in trouble right now because the one my grandmother loves and wants me to marry is pregnant and my grandmother insists that I should marry her.

I don't want to disappoint my grandmother because while she was ill, I went into her private papers and saw her will and I took the opportunity to read it.

She made the will last year December and it states that she is giving me the house and land, and she's giving three acres of farmland to my brother.

If I don't marry this girl, I am sure she is going to be angry and change her will. I cannot afford for her to do that. Neither can I afford to lose the girl my grandmother does not like.

I cannot tell the pregnant girl to have an abortion because I don't believe in that. She is graduating from college this year.

Help me, Pastor, to make a decision.


Dear C.M.,

I know for sure that your are a very careless man. I do not wish to embarrass you by saying what type of work you do. But a man of your status should know better and do better. You have already fathered three children.

Your grandmother cannot choose for you, but she has the right to express to you how she feels. She feels that you are heading for trouble.

You have been having unprotected sex with both of these young women as if you are crazy. You are very irresponsible.

You are going to have to settle down with the girl who is pregnant. That is the correct thing to do. Tell the brown-skin chick the truth.

She may either stone you or tell you that it is over, or she might hang on to you. But it is time for you to stop playing the fool.

Before you even tell this brown-skin girl that the relationship has to come to an end, you should also tell your grandmother what you plan to do.

I know some people would say that I am putting words in your mouth, but what I am trying to tell you is the correct thing to do.

I am not saying these things because of what you saw in your grandmother's will. I am saying these things because I would love for you to behave as a man.

I wish you all the best.


Other Tell Me Pastor Stories