He won't admit he fathered another child


August 24, 2017

Dear Pastor,

I am 24 and I've been with this guy from I was 17. He is six years older than me. When we first started the relationship, he told me that he had a daughter. I said OK, no problem.

We have been living together for over six years. We live at my sister's house but she is overseas. His daughter doesn't live with us.

About five years ago, his child's mother got pregnant and gave birth to another child. She said that the child is his, but he's saying otherwise.

Anyway, the two children are staying at his mother's house. Both of them call him Daddy. Although he told me that the child is not his, he tells other people that the child is his whenever he's not in my presence.

He likes to say that the child is his daughter's sister and she's innocent, and he's doing it for blessings.

His first child used to come and visit us, but whenever I asked him to go and get her he is always making some sort of excuse.

I like to think it's because he doesn't want to take one and leave the other. The other day was the child's graduation, and instead of telling me that he was going to the graduation, he told me that he got a charter to go out of town.

I would like your best advice on this situation.

Thanks in advance.


Dear G.P.

You believe that you know the truth, so don't make it hard for this man. Tell him to bring the two children to your house. He probably lied to you, and having lied to you for over five years, he finds it difficult to speak the truth now, so go easy on him.

And when you are buying gifts for the first child, buy something also for the other. You may tell your husband that you are aware that both children are his, and if you are wrong, you are doing it to receive blessings too, just like him.

However, you should warn him to learn to control himself and not to get this woman pregnant again. Accept both children as your own.


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