Don't want my dad to remarry


October 05, 2017

Dear Pastor,

My father has seven children. They are all alive, but my mother is dead. She died four years ago. My father is 75 years old and is interested in getting married again.

Two of his children are living at the home. The woman he loves comes to see him every week. We do not mind. She likes to cook.

She makes him soup sometimes, and sometimes she cooks a heavy meal for him, but mostly soup. She is a very nice lady. But none of his children want to see him get married again, and we told him so. And now he is vexed with all of us.

He does not believe that we want to see him happy, but we do. My father saw something that you wrote some time ago and showed it to us.

He said you are not against senior citizens getting married, so why should we, his children, be against him?

We are against him getting married because the woman he loves has nothing at all, as far as we know. We don't like where she lives and our father does not need anything from her.

He has our names on his accounts. We told him that we are not against this lady, but he should not think of marrying her.

Pastor, can you get a man for this lady so that she would leave our father alone? We would appreciate that.


Dear T.H.,

I don't know the particular letter to which you are referring, therefore, I cannot intelligently comment on what I said about senior citizens wanting to get married.

I know that I have addressed that issue on many occasions. To put it bluntly, there are times that I have said that children should leave their parents to make their own decisions, because often the parents are lonely and all the children are gone, and their parents need companionship.

Sometimes their parents, although they are in their 70s, feel the need for sexual gratification. Hence, they wish to be married and satisfy that need in the bond of marriage.

It is true that some widows are almost destitute and seek men who are widowers and who are financially stable to become their partners.

And, in that case, children have a right to get involved and protect their fathers and their estate. Some fathers have secretly got married when their children object.

You should know why your father wants to be married again. Therefore, your siblings, your father and yourself should sit and talk and come up with solutions.

Please bear in mind that it is not only women who are greedy and eager to get married to old men. Some men are greedy, too, and are eager to marry women who have wealth.

At least, your father is not wanting to marry a young girl. Some of these men in their senior years throw their money away on very young girls, and some women who are in their senior years waste their money on young men.

So as I close, I say to you, watch over your father. Your siblings and you have a duty to do so.


Other Tell Me Pastor Stories