Want to marry my non-Christian babyfather


November 18, 2017

Dear Pastor,

My mother used to laugh at me and my sister and told us that we must not force ourselves to grow up. She said we should take our time.

I couldn't wait until I was in my late teens to go on dates and have a boyfriend. When I was 16, my parents allowed my sister and I to have a double date. We knew the guys well.

We grew up in the same community. I did not like the guy who was my date. I liked my sister's date. They took us to the movies.

We left home together, but after we left home, we switched. I had my first kiss that night while at the movies, and that did it for me. I needed more.

Later on, he left for college. He told me on the phone that he had found a girl. I told him that I loved him and he should only keep that girl as a friend but nothing more.

When he came home for the Christmas break, my sister and I were home and she knew what was going on between us, so she allowed him to come and visit us.

He wanted to have sex with me, and I asked him if he did anything to the girl he met at college, and he told me yes because he was away from me. He tried to touch me, but I told him no.

Before he left to go back to school, I had sex with him and I got pregnant. Everybody except my sister was surprised to know I got pregnant because they said they had never seen me with a guy.

When my mother asked me how come I got pregnant and where did I have sex, I told her it was right here at home, and she said "in your father's house?"

My sister became the saint to my parents. But Pastor, she is no saint because she goes to evening school and she is with a married man.

The only difference between the both of us is that I got pregnant but she hasn't.

I went back to school after I had the baby. I am about to get married. The only problem that I am having now is that I became a Christian and my boyfriend isn't.

People are telling us that we are unequally yoked. So, I need to get your advice. We love each other.


Dear E.F.,

Any Christian who marries a non-Christian can be described as unequally yoked.

Often (but not always), if two people are married and one is a believer and the other isn't, they don't always get along well.

However, there are exceptions. Some couples get along very well, even when one is a Christian and the other isn't.

I would suggest that you talk to your minister about your situation. Both of you have a child together, and if there isn't any third party who would come between the both of you, and this man would not prevent you from going to church and to be active in your church, go ahead and get married.

But, before you do, lay out everything to this man. You are going to marry him because you do not want your child to be fatherless, so to speak. So, if your pastor would do the wedding, get married.


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