Babymother only eats, sleeps and watch TV


January 05, 2018

Dear Pastor,

I read your column often, and I get a lot of advice from it. Keep doing a good job. I have been living with my babymother at her place for a while now. The issue that I am having is that she has not been working since we met, so I do most of the spending and stuff, but when she does have money, she is not afraid to give me when I am in need.

Lately, I have noticed that we are not having sex. I don't pressure her into anything, because I have my work and my child to focus on. She is lazy, because most times she doesn't do anything at the house. She says that she is tired. All she does is eat, sleep, and watch the television. I hate that lifestyle, and I talked to her about it. But it doesn't make sense. She lacks emotion, and she cares very little about me.

When I get home at nights, no matter what time it is, my child will wake up just to be with me. And I am happy for that. No matter how sad I am, my baby always cheers me up, and I don't want to lose out on that. But I hate the negativity from my babymother. She is always on her phone, and I noticed that she has put on a security code on it, so I avoid her.

I am currently looking for a place to rent so I can be free and take care of my child without being distracted by her negativity. I made sure to tell her that if she is doing anything, she should make sure that it is worth it.

I am awaiting your response.


Dear D.S.,

Some women don't treat men well when the men are living with them in their own homes. Mark you, this is not true of all women. There are some very intelligent women who gladly share their homes with men, and nobody would know the homes are owned by the women. But some women, unfortunately, are very disrespectful to men when the men are living with them in homes that were bought by the women. They cause these men to always remember that they can throw them out at any time.

I do not doubt one bit that the love that this woman has for you has died, and that right now she is only using you. You say that she used to help you financially when she could. The question is, where did she get money to give to you if she was not working? I don't want to say anything bad about this woman. Perhaps she has good reasons for putting a security code on her phone. Perhaps she feels that she needs privacy. If you know that you were not searching her phone, you need not feel guilty about what she has done.

Try your best to rent a new place, but continue to support your child.


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