Parents don't approve of my boyfriend


January 26, 2018

Dear Pastor,

I am 18 years old. Since I was 15 and going to high school, I have been in love with a guy. His father is a Rasta.

I invited him to my church, but he said he couldn't come because his father would curse him. His father doesn't believe in Jesus.

He is very bright. His parents knew that we were friends. My parents never condemned him. They thought that what we had going on was 'kids' stuff'.

When he got his licence, he used to drive his father's vehicle and he used to offer me rides. One day, he picked me up when I was doing a summer job, and he told me that it was time for us to get serious in the relationship.

I told him that although I love him, we couldn't be intimate because he is a Rasta and I am not. He told me that he would start attending church. He started to come to church, but I wasn't sure whether he was doing that just for me.

He walked forward one Sunday night and became a Christian. The following Sunday night he got baptised. Now, my parents are telling me that this guy is not good enough for me.

This is the guy I like and I am not going to let my parents cause me to leave him. I am getting ready to go to university. My father said that although he is coming to church, that does not mean that he has changed.

We had sex two times and I always say that the man who took my virginity is the one I would marry. I don't want to disobey my parents because, without them, I would not be able to go to university. I would like to hear your opinion.


Dear R.T.,

Please be very careful. I know that you love this guy, but do not do anything to cause you to regret. You are planning to go to university and if you believe that you and this young man must have sex, you should protect yourself from pregnancy.

I know that you are an adult and your parents should not try to choose your future partner for you, but at the same time, you should not ignore totally what they are saying.

Please listen to them, because you are always going to need them. At 18, you should be able to reason with your parents about your future. So, do so from time to time.


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