My cousin got me pregnant
I am 18 and I am living in Kingston, but I am from the country. I came up here to attend school. My uncle and his wife promised to help me.
I have a cousin who is 25. He is working in Kingston, so he stays here with my uncle and my aunt. He has two children with his girlfriend.
From the time I came here, he has been telling me how much he loves me and he wants us to be friends. I told him no, because we are cousins.
He said that might be true, but nobody would know. He told me that we would just have sex and he would keep his girlfriend, and I could always have a boyfriend.
My uncle is a deacon in his church. I have been going to the church from the time I came to live in Kingston. One Sunday I did not go to church because my aunt was expecting some friends, so she asked me to stay home and do some preparations.
I wasn't thinking of my cousin, otherwise I would have locked the back door.
When he realised that I was here alone, he came in and started to beg me for sex. I told him that I couldn't do that. He said nothing would happen.
I told him that he should leave, otherwise I would tell my aunt and my uncle.
He started to help me to do what my aunt had left for me to do. Then he said if I had given him sex, we would have finished long ago and he would have gone back to his room.
He started to push his hand up my skirt, and I gave in to him and we had sex. It didn't take us more than five minutes.
From the time I missed my period, I figured out that I might be pregnant and I told him. He told me that we could get rid of that. He took me to a certain place and he paid for the abortion.
I didn't want my aunt to know, so I didn't say anything.
I became ill and my aunt and uncle asked me what was wrong. I told them I got pregnant, but didn't tell them by whom.
My aunt said if I didn't tell them who it was, she was going to send me back to the country. So I told them.
Afterwards, they said I still had to go because they didn't expect that of me. But my father begged my uncle to let me stay. They told my cousin that he had to leave.
I am having two problems now - I feel guilty about the abortion, and now my aunt is saying that she doesn't know how to trust me again.
This guy is no longer at the house but he is still texting me, saying that he loves me and nobody is going to stop him from loving me.
Somebody told me that people who had abortions, on Judgement Day, the babies will be crying at their feet. Is that true? I wouldn't want to remember that I had an abortion.
I am glad to hear that the relatives with whom you are living have agreed to give you a second chance and not send you back to rural Jamaica.
Your cousin who got you pregnant is a very cunning man. It's a pity that you did not report him when you observed that he was interested in you. I suppose you did not believe that he would inveigle you to have sex with him.
I hope that you would learn from what has happened to you. Please don't have anything to do with this man. Ignore him. Keep far away from him.
Concerning what you have asked me about children on Judgement Day, please do not allow that to cause you to be depressed. What you have heard is not true.
What you should do is to make sure that you ask the good Lord to forgive you for terminating the pregnancy. What you need is forgiveness and to have a peace of mind, and only God can forgive you and grant you peace.
I wish you the very best in life.