Boyfriend determined to take my virginity


March 29, 2018

Dear Pastor,

I am 16 years old and my boyfriend is 18 years old. He comes to our house on weekends, and he helps me with my schoolwork. We love each other. Sometimes I am only home with the helper, but she wouldn't say anything to my parents because she knows that my parents know my boyfriend, and they do not suspect that we are doing anything naughty.

One day my boyfriend went to use the bathroom, and I went to peep at him to see the size of his penis. I was just fooling around. He said he didn't have anything to hide, so he showed it to me. I told him that it was too large, and that I am afraid of it. He said that I was unfair because I saw his penis so he should see my vagina.

I went to see where the helper was. She was outside chatting with the neighbour's helper. I came back and my boyfriend insisted that I show him my vagina. I pulled my jeans halfway down and told him that he may touch it, but that is it. He started to fondle me, and it felt so good. If the helper didn't call me, it would have gone further. When I asked the helper what was the matter, she said that there wasn't a problem but that I was too quiet in the house. When I asked him if the helper didn't come and call me, if he was going to have sex with me, he said he would because he saw on my face how I was enjoying it.

I am a virgin and I never had sex. I will be 17 in July. My boyfriend said we should finish what we started. I told him I don't want to have sex with him. He told me that he would have to get it even if he has to rape me, and that it is no joke.

Pastor, should I tell him not to come back to my house? I love him so much.


Dear E.S.,

You and this young man went too far. You were playing with fire when you told him that you wanted to see the size of his penis. And one thing led to the other. This reminds me of the game little children used to play. I say used to because I do not know if children these days know this game. The little game was called 'show me yours and I show you mine'. But at your age, you are much too old for that, and you ought to have known better. You were setting up yourself for sex. You should be thankful that the helper called you and wanted to know where you were. This guy should not be encouraged to come back to your house.

Don't take his threats lightly. He will rape you if he gets the chance. Tell your father what he said to you. End the friendship with him. He is not joking. You don't have to get help from him with your schoolwork. You cannot say you have not been warned.


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