My wife does not trust me!


June 23, 2016

Dear Pastor,

This is my first time writing to you. I have a situation and I need your advice. I have been with my wife for five years going on to six and have been married for six months. We are both 25 years old.

The problem is, she can't seem to trust me. I have made some wrong decisions in the past and we went to counselling for it. She said she forgave me.

But now that we are married, there is always a fuss. She brings up everything and uses it against me. If I talk to the opposite sex, there must be something going on.

I am a prominent businessman, so I meet a lot of people. And now she is saying I am having an affair, which is not true. I have been faithful to her for a long time now. I don't know what else to do.


Dear J.T.,

I believe you. However, you ought to know that your wife will always be suspicious of you, especially if you were involved with other women before the both of you got married. She believes that it is in you to be bad. So every time she sees you talking to the opposite sex, she becomes nervous and uncomfortable. She is always watching you. You might not be doing anything wrong, but you should understand how she feels.

You see, sir, it may take your wife a while to build back trust in you. Whatever happened in the past, she forgave you and eventually got married to you, but she has not forgotten the past. She suffered stress and depression during the time you played around with other women. Therefore, what I am asking you to do, sir, is to have patience with your wife. She might be paranoid, but remember that you contributed to her being that way. You will have to heap lots and lots of love on this woman. It might even appear that you are going overboard. Never make her feel uncomfortable when you are among other women; even if it means that you have to say 'hi' and 'bye' to these women, do so. Try to protect your marriage.


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