My married boss got me pregnant


June 24, 2016

Dear Pastor,

I am 22. I was working as a helper with a man and his wife. I was in charge of the house, four bedrooms.

The wife was not very kind, but the man was. She was always busy with her work. The man had more time at home.

He always fussed with her. I heard him, many times, telling her she had no time for him. She said she was her own boss and could not rely on her workers.

I used to cook. When the man came home, I would put his dinner on the table.

One day, he told me I should sit with him sometimes when he comes home because he doesn't like eating alone all the time.

I was shy, but, if I didn't he would call me to come.

One weekend when his wife went to Barbados, he told me he was going to invite one of his girlfriends over so I should not let his wife know.

When the girl came, she was younger than I am. He introduced her to me. He told me I should let her use my bathroom because he did not want her to leave anything around for his wife to know there was another woman there. I told him, "No problem".

The girl and I became good friends. I asked her how she got to know him. She told me it was business. I asked her what kind of business. She did not want to tell me. She just repeated, "business". She spent the Friday and the Saturday with him, but he did not take her anywhere.


One day he told me he had something to tell me. I asked him if he was going to fire me. He said no. He told me he had been admiring me and wants us to be friends.

I told him he was too bad and I had a boyfriend in the country who trusts me.

He told me he was not telling me to leave my boyfriend. I told him he should give me some time to think about it.

His wife came in, had her shower and ate and said she had to go to a meeting. He said he was going to play dominoes with his friends. Both left in their vehicles.

It seemed her husband did not go far. He came back and knocked on my room door. I half-opened the door to talk to him. I opened it because he wanted to come in.

He started to kiss me. I did not have on any underwear because I was alone in my room and had gone to bed. We had sex and he fell asleep in my room.

I had to wake him to go to his room before his wife came back.

From that time, we had sex regularly. It is his wife who pays me every week. After we started to have sex, he gave me $2,500 extra every week.

I go home every other week. One weekend I went home and stayed with my boyfriend. He said I looked different. I did not know I was pregnant. When I got back to Kingston and went to the doctor, the doctor confirmed I was pregnant. I don't know what to do.

My boss told me I should give my boyfriend the child, but my boyfriend knows he is not the child's father. He said that if my boyfriend doesn't accept the child, he would 'mind' it, but I should not call his name.

I don't see how I can carry this child or how I can hide it from my boyfriend.


I am confused. I don't know what to do. The lady of the house never suspected I was having sex with her husband.

He behaves as if he is the perfect gentleman when she is around. He doesn't even look at me. One day when we were having sex. I asked him, what would happen if he got me pregnant. He told me that would not happen.

I am pregnant now. It is his wife who caused it. If she had stayed around and did her wifely duties, he wouldn't come after me or pay to sleep with prostitutes. What is your advice, pastor?


Dear S.H.,

What this man told you about not calling his name, if you got pregnant, is what married men tell single girls all the time.

I suggest if you are indeed pregnant, that you carry the pregnancy.

Do not do anything that will haunt you, like having an abortion.

Your male boss and you became intimate and careless. His wife, he said, was too busy for him so he got involved with other women.

You allowed him to have unprotected sex with you. He should not now behave as if you have the right to protect him. You are going to have to leave his house very soon. Perhaps you should have been gone already.

It would be wrong for you to try to get your boyfriend to accept paternity when you know he is not responsible for getting you pregnant.

I cannot encourage you to do an abortion. If you do not want to keep the child after you have given birth, discuss the matter with the father and give up the child for adoption.

By the way, you are not under any obligations to explain to anybody how you became pregnant and by whom.


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