Don't like to kiss my man without his dentures

by

July 04, 2016

Dear Pastor,

Greetings to you and your staff. I find your column to be very interesting.

I am having a problem. I am a 62-year-old woman and I lost my husband two years ago. I tried to keep to myself, but in November last year, I met a man. He is 69 years old. I like him and I started to go out with him.

When we started to sleep together, I noticed that he would take out his dentures. When he kissed me, it felt funny because I was kissing a man without any teeth at all and he loved to kiss. His mouth looks so 'mashed' when he does not have in his dentures.

I told him that he should put his dentures in until after we have made love, but he is not doing so, and I can't deal with just his gums.

I love this man. He wants to marry me. When my husband died, he left me in a rent house. This man has his own home and his children have accepted me. They just want me to take care of their father. He said his mouth is cleaner without his dentures. I don't want to leave him, but I can't stand to see him or kiss him without his dentures. Please give me your advice.

E. S.

Dear E. S.,

First of all, I am glad that you have found another man and that you love him. The problem that you are now facing with him doesn't sound insurmountable. It seems to me that if you love this man, you should work with him, bearing in mind that he is not a young man; and even some young men have lost some of their teeth. So, although you would prefer to have a man with all his teeth in place, you should thank heavens that you have found a man who loves and respects you and whose children consider you as a good woman for their father. You would prefer if this man would kiss you with his dentures in, that is reasonable.

Doctors say it is not advisable for people who wear dentures to sleep in them every night.

The following information may be of help to you. Please discuss them with your man.

"Sleeping in dentures can have serious health consequences. A recent study published in the 'Journal of Dental Research', found that nursing-home residents who wore their dentures to sleep were 2.3 times more likely to be hospitalised or even die of pneumonia as those who did not sleep in dentures. But how can wearing dentures at night more than double your chances of getting a lung infection?

"As the study noted, pneumonia-causing bacteria can readily be moved from the mouth to the lungs simply by breathing. And dentures that are not removed at night can become breeding grounds for all kind of bacteria and fungi (such as yeast). That's what makes them potentially dangerous.

"Another condition often seen in people who wear upper dentures continually is called denture stomatitis, which is characterised by a red, inflamed palate (roof of the mouth) that has been infected with yeast. The yeast microorganisms can also infect cracked corners of the mouth, a condition known as angular cheilitis. Moreover, it has also been shown that people who sleep in dentures have higher blood levels of a protein called interleukin 6, which indicates that the body is fighting an infection. Need we go on?

"Wearing dentures is supposed to improve your quality of life, not reduce it. So promote good health by taking your dentures out at night, and sticking to a good daily oral hygiene routine:

Remove and rinse your dentures after every meal.

Brush your dentures at least once a day with a soft toothbrush or denture brush and dish soap, liquid antibacterial soap, or denture cleanser (but don't use toothpaste - it is too abrasive).

Store your dentures in water or a solution made for this purpose. Brush your gums and tongue every day with a soft toothbrush (not the same one you clean your dentures with). Rinse your dentures in clean water before you put them back in your mouth."

I wish this man and you happy years together. Please let me hear from you again.

Pastor

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