My relationship is going nowhere


October 19, 2016

Dear Pastor,

I am with my spouse for more than five years and I have observed that this relationship is not going anywhere.

I am planning to leave this man, but I am scared to let him know. So I am planning to go to my aunt for a weekend and don't return for a long while. Do you think that that is a good idea?


Dear Unnamed,

I do not think that that is a good idea. You should tell this man that you are not enjoying the relationship the both of you are having and it does not appear that there is a future.

Therefore, you believe that the relationship should come to an end. Ask him whether or not he sees it the same way. If he says that he disagrees with you, you should tell him that both of you should go and see a family counsellor so that you can both get some sort of professional help.

This man might be taking you for granted because you have not been saying anything. He might believe that you are satisfied with what is happening. But now that you are expressing yourself, he might do something.

It is either that he is going to marry you or allow you to go. Just tell him that you are not willing to hang around any longer, because you are unhappy not being married.

He should not just try to assure you that he will marry you. You need to know when, because you have already been together for five years and you cannot allow another five years to roll by and you are in the same situation.

I wish you well as you put your cards on the table. If he tells you to go, you can do whatever you want to do, then talk to your aunt and put your plans in place.


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