My man ignores me until he wants sex


November 02, 2016

Dear Pastor,

I am 24 years old and I am seeing a man who has a five-year-old daughter. He lives with his brother. I live in New Jersey. He has two jobs. He goes to medical school and he picks up his daughter from school every day and stays with her until her mother comes for her. He is an activist and teaches after school.

Pastor, we hardly see each other. Sometimes two weeks pass and we don't see each other. If I talk about it, he would say that he has to work and pick up his daughter and so on, and how no one can live with him because they wouldn't understand his involvement in lots of things.

If I don't call or text him, he doesn't contact me unless he wants me for sexual purposes. I have talked to him about our situation and lack of communication about four times and nothing has changed.

I am fed up and I really feel I should leave him at this point even though I love him. I am not the type to just leave a relationship when it's not going well. I try to make it work.

Pastor, please advise me what I should do.

S. M.

Dear S.M.,

This man is talking nonsense. No man should be too busy to see the woman he loves. Any man who is in a serious relationship makes time to spend with his woman regardless how busy he is. He is talking trash. How come when he wants to have sex he finds time for you?

Don't listen to his nonsense. If the relationship means anything at all to him, he would arrange his time so he can be with you. He is trying to fool you and using his activities as an excuse for ignoring you.

I wonder how he would feel if he were to discover that you were seeing another man. He wouldn't take kindly to that at all. Please understand that I am not telling you that that is what you should do. Don't get involved with another man unless you and this guy have totally broken up.

He says that no one understands him. He is insulting your intelligence. You understand what he is doing, and that is why you feel that it might be time for you to move on. He doesn't communicate with you well. He is not serious about the relationship. It is time for you to take action against him.


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