I went on a date with a con man

Dear Pastor,

I am 26 years old. I met a man in the bank. We were standing in the line together, and we began talking. He said that he is Jamaican, but he is living in the United States of America. He said that he is in Jamaica visiting his mother because she has not been well, but he will be leaving the island in one week time. He seemed like a very decent man. I asked him if he is married, and he said no, but he is looking for a wife because he wants to marry someone from 'yard'. All the girls he met in America have failed him. They want too much and they are controlling.

He said he has one daughter, and she is living with her mother, and it is costing him a lot. I asked him for his number and he said that the phone he is using is not his, but I should give him my number and he will call me. This man was neatly dressed. I went to the teller before him, but he waited for me. When I was finished, I stopped to talk to him. I told him where I work and the name of my boss. I offered him a ride to where he was going, but he said he was not ready to go home, and that he was waiting for a couple of his schoolmates.

We planned to meet again. I did not think that this man was a liar or a thief or anything like that. He seemed so genuine. He called me the following day on a blocked number and I told him that we can go for dinner at such and such a place. He said he could meet me there. I went and we ordered dinner. He told me how much he was in love with me. I told him I had a man in my life and that in a year time we would be married.

When it was time for us to pay the bill, this man pushed his hand in his pocket and said, "My, my, I forget my wallet, I don't have any money." Pastor, I had to use my credit card. It was then I realised that I had gone out with a con man because he even wanted to come to my house for the night.

I dropped him in New Kingston. He said he would call me but he has to be a careful because he works undercover in America. I never heard from him again and I can't call him.

I am an educated girl and I always say that men cannot trick me, but I was tricked. He never wanted me to use my phone, so I don't even have a picture of him, but he has a picture of me. I want to tell this man not to fool around me because I would recognise him anywhere I see him.

Tell me what to do, dear Pastor.

T.E

Dear T.E.,

This man, as you said, tricked you. He is a con man, but by talking to you he discovered that you are an intelligent woman and he would not be able to have his way with you. Perhaps you agreed to meet with him because you felt that there was a possibility that both of you could have a good relationship and he may even marry you.

Did he tell you his name? As a con man, he would not have given you his correct name. He didn't ask you for money but you said he wanted to come home with you that evening after dinner. I know you took it for granted that this man would pay for the dinner. Well, in these days, you can't take anything for granted.

I am sorry, but the man robbed your money. He has no principle. He is a thief. And if you were to see this man and call him, it is likely that he would insult you and say that he doesn't know you at all, and that you are a mad woman and you are lying on him. I am happy that this man didn't hurt you physically, but be careful how you handle men in the future.

Pastor