Tired of his money problems


November 13, 2015

Dear Pastor,

I am 28. I have been with a man for two years. He is 36. I live with my parents and he came to do some work on the house. I was new to the community and we started hanging out until we got involved. He had just been out of a relationship. We lived lovingly and he treated me like a queen. He was living with his babymother and they separated, so he went overseas and then came back and started living with his aunt. That was when I met him.

His aunt had some visitors at her house, so he started staying at my house, and my father, who doesn't like anyone, loved him like a son. My mom didn't really like him because she doesn't like dark-skinned men and she and I were very close, so she was jealous of me having someone around. He was very kind to me, but I was employed and had things for myself. I had a car and we decided to use it as a taxi. He is a contractor and I worked for the government. Things got slow for him. A relative borrowed his money and didn't pay him back, and so on.

good business

He wanted to do some business, so my dad helped him financially, and I assisted, too. His business was going well until he asked a relative to assist him. He started losing money and he spoke to her about it. all hell broke out. She was known in the community, so she started spreading rumours about his business and said she was going to obeah him.

The place wasn't convenient anymore, so my family relocated. he came also and lived with us. He takes very good care of us. I got sick last year, then I was diagnosed with lupus. With my financial constraints and him losing the business and not getting any job, things got really badly for us. I was now unable to help my dad with the bills and so was he. My dad got mad and started cursing him really bad and because mom didn't like him, she also cursed him. He started doing some work at our house and it drew a lot of crowd. My father cursed even more. He has a child in the country. The child got sick and developed kidney problems so it was stress everywhere. Every dollar he made, he gave me for the doctor because my take home pay was really small. I sold my car to pay my medical expenses and my father helped me now and then. My mom is not working. We had bad luck all over.

staying out

My dad stopped him from working on our property and he started staying out late on the road. I started getting miserable because I am not friendly and I am a house girl. My mom started telling me that he has other girls and I started arguing with him over it.

He met a lady four months ago and started doing a contract with her on her house. Ever since he met her, he is a changed man. He follows her and her sister everywhere. He comes home at midnight. He says she is a businesswoman and she gives him a lot of work. I understand that, but I told him to make time for us. Sometimes, I am sick and he is not here. He is out with her. He said it's just business and he said I could come with him, but because I am antisocial, I don't want to. He came home late two times, so I put him out and he went to the house that she owns and is living there. She doesn't live there anymore, so she allowed him to stay there. My mom said they were together, but I found proof after a time that they were not. He got really ill when I kicked him out. The doctors couldn't figure out what was wrong with him, so the lady took him to a obeah woman who told him one of his exes had obeah him and he was going to die. He called me and I told him to go to church. He did and he got better. He only feels sick now and again, but nothing serious.


Dear Help,

Everywhere this man turns 'macka jook' him. I still would like to find out why is it that young women are so quick to allow men to come to live with them in their parents' homes. Why is it that young women are not allowing men to get to know them well before they get sexually involved with them? What has happened to courtship? This man came into your life and before you could snap your fingers, you gave your car over to operate as a taxi.


Perhaps your father liked him because he was making a financial contribution to the home, but as he got to know him well, the love turned to hate and money wasn't running, so to speak, so his mind changed from him. The guy should not have been living there.

He has allowed this woman to convince him that he needed the help of an obeah woman. Does he now believe what the obeah woman said? She might be pointing fingers at you. Why should you continue to have a relationship with this man? Please give me a call.


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