Cheating man leaves woman depressed


December 09, 2015

Dear Pastor,

I will be 36 in two weeks. I am the mother of three lovely children. I have been in a relationship with this man who I thought was my 'match made in heaven' for the last 13 years.

We have two children together. Pastor, I love this man with all my heart, mind and soul. There is nothing I wouldn't do for him.

On the other hand, pastor, there is nothing I can't tell you this man hasn't done to me. He cheated throughout the 13 years. He impregnated a girl twice during our relationship. He lies constantly. He gave me a sexually transmitted disease. If you name it, he did it. This is a man I have never, ever, cheated on.

Pastor, he is a very good father to his children and provider. As a man, I cannot take that from him, but he is the worst partner.

I work but am afraid to leave mainly because I cannot afford to pay rent, utilities and take care of three kids on my own.

I have tried leaving already and was really happy when I did but just couldn't manage financially.

Every time I threatened to leave, he brings up marriage and how he cannot imagine life without me. However, each time I give him a chance, in a month or less, he is back to his old ways. He curses in front of the kids and apologises after. I am really tired and fed-up of this man and this life. Please give me your sound advice. Keep doing good to people around the world.


Dear S.D.,

I don't believe anyone could really tell you what to do in this relationship. You have tried to leave this man but it has not worked. I think fear got the better of you and, until you can overcome fear, you always would go back to this man.

The fear of not being able to maintain yourself and the children without this man will always keep you locked to him.

This man is wild and he does not care about himself and about you. When I say that, I mean to say he is careless. He has had unprotected sex with other women and, naturally, he picked up a venereal disease and passed it on to you.

Of course, if you were to have the courage to leave this man and could maintain yourself, you could force him, through the court, to support his children.

I believe the love you have for him is strong, and that is what is the bottom line. He has promised to marry you but has not kept his word. Take the initiative, call a counsellor and ask him or her to meet with both of you. I wish you the very best.


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