Can't get pregnant for my ex-con boyfriend


September 05, 2018

Dear Pastor,

I am having a problem. I am 31 years old and I have never had children, but I have had different men in my life. I was on the Pill, but I got off it because I wanted to get pregnant.

I went to the US and I had a relationship with my boss. He was a white man. He got me pregnant, but I had a miscarriage and he was glad because when I got pregnant, he told me that his wife would leave him.

I started to fret. I don't know if that was the reason why I had the miscarriage.

One day I started to bleed heavily and my friends rushed me to the doctor, but I lost the baby. I came back to Jamaica and I am having a relationship with an ex-prisoner.

My relatives don't know that he is an ex-prisoner. He is very nice. But, pastor, he is so rough when it comes to the bed business. Sometimes when he has sex with me, I have to cry.

Even when I cry, he doesn't stop until he discharges, and when we are finished, he hugs me and tells me that he loves me and that I would get accustomed to his private part.

I don't know what to do because I don't want to lose him. I have a good job. He does his own business. He cannot go back to the US, but he would like to.

I have given up having a child. This man wants to marry me. Would you suggest that I marry him? I am looking forward to your answer.


Dear E.R.,

First of all, let me suggest that you discuss with your gynaecologist the problem that you are having when you are having sex. Your gynaecologist should be able to tell you what the problem is.

You got involved with your employer in the US. He got you pregnant, but you lost the pregnancy.

You were hoping that one of the guys that you were dating here in Jamaica would have got you pregnant, but that didn't happen.

Now you feel that you shouldn't bother about getting pregnant anymore. But you are worried about the pains you feel during intercourse.

You say that your boyfriend is an ex-prisoner and that he is very rough in bed; I suggest, again, that you talk to your gynaecologist.

Not many people know that your lover is an ex-convict. If you love him, that is good enough. It shouldn't be anybody's business whether or not you marry him.

Both of you should go to see a family counsellor and discuss your problems and your future.


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