My sons forcing me to get a wife

Dear Pastor,

I am writing to you from 0verseas, but I am Jamaican. I am a 68-year-old widower.

My wife passed on six months ago, so my children encouraged me to come and spend some time with them. Since I have been here, my children, especially my daughter, are encouraging me to stay. They are all encouraging me to sell out what we have in Jamaica and move to America. That is not something that I can do easily because I love my country.

My children treat me very well, but when they are at work, I am here alone watching television. My sons take me out and they even suggested to me that I need a girlfriend. I am not saying that I will never get married again, but I do not want to be in a position where I will have to support a woman. I am fortunate that my wife and I saved our money and when she died, I did not have to touch our savings. The children took charge of everything. Our savings are secured in Jamaica.

Nothing is wrong with me, Sir, but I don’t feel for a woman right now. But my boys are telling me that their mother is not coming back, so I should not fret over her. There is a woman who is living very close to where I am and whenever I go outside, I don’t know where she is before, but she finds herself in a position where I can see her. She hails me and I hail her back and go back inside. I don’t know what happened to these women.

When I told my children about what she is doing, they told me that I look strong and healthy and the woman is only trying to be nice to me, but they made a big joke about it. I am not ready for a woman. This would drive me back to Jamaica sooner than I expected to. I have a green card, so I don’t have to be in any fear of overstaying my time.

I don’t know when I will get over the death of my wife.

L.

Dear L.,

I regret hearing that your wife has passed. I am glad that your children and you get along very well.

They love you and they are taking very good care of you. Your sons are teasing you about getting married again. I am sure they are not telling you that you should be in a hurry to remarry. They feel, however, that you need to have another good woman in your life. Don’t take them on as yet. You do not feel that you should be in a hurry to remarry or even to have a close female friend. Boys will be boys. So perhaps some of the things they say to you are their way of cheering you up.

Concerning this woman who is not living far away, she sees you and perhaps she admires you. Maybe she is endeavouring to be friendly. She might indeed be trying to throw herself at you, but you don’t have to reciprocate. Continue to enjoy your visit in America. But Jamaica is your country, so don’t allow anyone, including your children to try to control you.

I wish you well.

Pastor