Grandaunt has stopped helping me with school

Dear Pastor,

I hope you are doing okay. I am attending university, but my grandaunt was the person who persuaded me to start.

However, lately, because of some family dispute with her daughter, she told me some expletives and said that I should let my man help me finish university. She told me many expletives before this incident. I don’t have the money to help myself. So, as the old saying goes, sometimes one has to kiss ass, sometimes until one can do better.

My mom has a disability, so she can’t do much to help me. My grandaunt had encouraged me to take out a student loan and, evidently, I would have to pay them back. She said that she would pay my rent. I know that going to a foreign country is not a bed of roses. That is where she resides, but she was the one who encouraged me to go back to school, and I agreed. She told me some disgraceful things but I didn’t answer her because I have to be grateful to her. But it has taken a toll on my mental health. I don’t have anybody to communicate with at the moment, and my GPA was good but it has dropped because of everything that I am going through in my life.

What I am saying is, if she knew she was unable to support me, she should have told me at the beginning of the semester, because everybody has their own problems. She has blocked me and told me I have to figure out a way to finish school on my own. What do you suggest that I do? I do not plan to give up. I have reached very far in my studies. I am planning to seek a job in December to help myself.

A.

Dear A.,

I can assure you of my prayers. I do not know why your grandaunt has decided to turn against you if you have not been rude to her. You said that there was a dispute in the family, so that might have caused your aunt to stop assisting you. That is indeed very unfortunate. A person can stop assisting a relative, but it is not necessary to use expletives.

I do not know whether or not you are a Christian, but I want to assure you that, if you put your confidence in God, he will give you the victory. Your grandaunt has told you that your man should take up the responsibility to put you through university. You have not said whether or not you have a man. You should know that not every man is willing to support a woman who is seeking a university education. I appreciate the fact that you respect your grandaunt because of what she has done for you so far. But, right now, she is endeavouring to break your will and that is very unfortunate. In plain Jamaican talk, she is behaving as if she is showing off on you.

I hope that you would not be tempted to give up on your studies. I also hope that you will be able to get a job when you are on your Christmas break. You did not state what type of job you would love but, in your situation, you can’t pick and choose. Talk to your friends at university. Let everybody know that you are seeking help. I am sure that help will come your way.

If you attend church, talk to your minister and his wife and tell them that you need help. Again, you have my prayers. Please let me hear from you again.

Pastor